Health and Fitness Information Center

Talking to your children about weight, Part 1

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Nevertheless, parents can be uneasy about raising the issue of overweight, fearing that to do so will hurt their child's feelings, damage self-esteem or make food and eating a "big issue". Like all sensitive issues there are more and less helpful ways of talking to your child about their weight.

This guide to the Do's and Don'ts of talking to children about weight is based on Tanita's experience of talking to hundreds of children and families about weight problems.

Before talking to your child, it is a good idea to make sure whether they are actually overweight. It can be difficult to know if you should be concerned about your child's weight. Health professionals use several measures to check if a child is overweight including Body Mass Index (BMI), waist circumference and body fat.

Whether or not you want to talk in detail to your child about weight might depend on what you expect them to do about it.

Children up to the age of 7 have little direct control over what they eat and how they spend their time. Your child's weight can be managed by controlling their access to sugary and fatty foods and making sure there is plenty of opportunity to be active. At this age, few children would benefit from talking about weight, although parents should still emphasise healthy messages about food and activity.

Primary School age children (age 7 - 11) have the opportunity to make more choices about what they eat and what they do. Managing weight during these years usually involves some degree of co-operation between parent and child. Because of this, it can be helpful for parents to talk to their child about why they are being asked to eat fewer unhealthy foods.

Adolescents (age 12 onwards) have quite sophisticated views about nutrition, health and strong feelings about whether they like the look of their bodies at a heavier weight. They have more (but not total) responsibility for the food that they eat and how they spend their time. They can understand the idea of managing weight, and with support, can come up with creative ideas about this.